I Got Your Back

Over the last few years, I have been on an adult coed indoor soccer team. I have been playing with and against pretty much the same people for the last 5 years. I have become friends with quite a few of the players I play against. Not knowing their backgrounds, maybe having played against some from my childhood, knowing that they are over 25, but not knowing much else. That's the beauty of being in ANY kind of community, you share some kind of foundation and you can enjoy the quick friendships to be found in your community without judgment or expectation. I have been watching two players in particular over the last few years. They are husband and wife, Tom and Paulynn. I am amazed at how much I learned about their relationship by merely watching how they play the game of soccer.

Now, I must say that I was slightly surprised by the abilities of these two players. At first glance, they weren't the type of people I was used to playing against. First of all, the woman is the goalie. Now, again trying not to sound too stereotypical, but I am used to keepers being crazy and quick to sacrifice their bodies to save a goal. I am not willing to do that, so my assumption is that not many other women would be willing to do that. This woman is more than willing, she LOVES playing keeper. I am not sure how many times my shots have found her face in the way of the goal. Her husband is a bit stockier, more like the shape of a linebacker, but man he is a freight train on the soccer field. I still have no idea how he can get to the ball so quickly. I quickly found out how fast he really was the first few games I played against this couple.  After hitting his wife square on a few times, I quickly became his "personal project." If ever the ball came to me, so did he. I had to find a way around the freight train if ever I wanted the ball to get into the goal. It wouldn't be easy.

I noticed as I watched them play other teams that as soon as the other team started finding their way to the goal more often, Tom would immediately step in and be a wall in front of his wife. Now, I don't want you to think that Paulynn is some delicate little flower that needs protection, because she is not. This woman plays with the heart of a lion and the courage of a rhinoceros. All she knows is to do her job, and that's what she does. She relies on her team to do their job but they all know that she's got their back and will do her best to not let them down. So Tom and Paulynn are playing the game the exact same way. They have each other's back. What a fantastic way to be in a relationship. Trusting that the other person is going to have your back merely by doing what they always do--what they're good at. Tom steps up his play to protect his wife. Paulynn steps up her game to not let Tom down when the ball gets past him. Pure trust. Does the ball get by them? If I am lucky, quick and have my supporting teammates, yes. But not as often as it should.

The other thing I have noticed is they ask each other what they saw when they got scored on. They don't chastise each other about what the other person did or didn't do. Rather, they ask if there was anything else they could have done. I have also heard many times, "Yeah, that was my fault." I love playing with and against these kinds of players--both on the field and off. It reminds me that it is a game, a really fun game. Life is life, and it is a really fun life. And I get to do my part so others can do their parts. My husband and I have that kind of relationship, too. I hope it can get to the extent of Tom and Paulynn where I always have my husband's back by merely doing my best and I trust he's got mine.

Quote of the day: I fell in love with football as I would later fall in love with women: suddenly, uncritically, giving no thought to the pain it would bring. -- Nick Hornby (remember that "football" is soccer everywhere else but in the US)

Anecdote of the day: My 7 year old daughter, upon learning from her wonderful aunt what the definition of "flatulation" was, proudly stated "Conflatulations on your fart!"