Since when did it matter that a 4 year old girl have her hair done just to run around and get grass in it? Well, since every other little girl's mom thought it was important that they look good chasing a ball. I hated it when my mom did my hair...except on Saturdays because I knew it meant I was playing soccer. Seriously, there is still a picture that is in my memory of my hair making Edward Scissorhands' hair look traditional. You know, hair looking like straw parted in a few different places, but in a really pretty blue dress. My mom would rather have a picture with me in it with crazy hair than having a picture without me.
Funny how a tomboy playing soccer could french braid her own hair while running down the field doing warm ups. I always did my hair for soccer. When I got into high school, that rule was the same...game day we wore special shirts or dressed up. My coach even said on our first school sanctioned Girls High School Soccer game, "Ladies, it doesn't matter how you play today, because you at least look good." He had ordered white shorts. What coach would ever make the women's soccer team wear white shorts?!? Right, a man coach. The funny thing is, I didn't wear makeup to the games and I distinctly remember referring to a few girls I played against as "Barbie" because they wore makeup. I don't remember how they played. So I guess coach was right, it doesn't matter how you play as long as you look good.
You will still see in professional soccer, the rule that players' shirts must be tucked in to start the game. I still don't get that rule, but I do remember it. I also remember almost immediately untucking my shirt as soon as the whistle blew. It doesn't matter how you play as long as you look good.
Man, does that hit home. For years my husband came home to a wife of four kids that looked like she just got out of bed no matter what time it was. But I would definitely shower, do my hair, put on my makeup if I was going to purposely see my neighbors or go to the store. Just so everyone else would think that I was on top of things. It didn't matter how I was playing, as long as I looked good.
There were moments that this lesson that were quite poignant in my life, lessons that I would conveniently and quickly forget. While serving a mission for my church, I met many wonderful women that would dress up in their best clothes to show their respect while worshipping God and going to church. I would watch them with their smiles and their hair done, makeup on, and their bright colorful shirts and their as equally bright and colorful skirts. I loved that the color in their shirts didn't match the color of their skirts, because I knew that to them best matched best. They wanted to wear their most beautiful shirt with their most beautiful skirt. And it worked. I remembered how beautiful they were. They looked good because they felt good.
I have three beautiful spices. (We call our girls spices because you never know what flavor you'll get in the moment) My husband has lovingly and laughingly watched me over the years cringe as they dress themselves for their first birthday party, their first day of school, or their first school report. His comment as I began to ask them if they really wanted to wear their clothes... "They feel really good about themselves, don't take that away." I would smile and think to myself, favorite matches favorite and that works just fine.
I still find myself dressing up and looking good on those days that I just don't feel good. I also find myself looking great on the days I absolutely feel great. On the days that I don't feel like the most beautiful woman on earth, I have my husband pick out clothes that he thinks I look great in, I make sure I take time to do my hair and my makeup, and then I hope that somehow the makeup will leak into my skin and make some sort of wonderful transformation on the inside. Or I merely just remember that I am the same person on the days I look fantastic as well as the days that my hair takes on that Edward Scissorhands touch. The only difference is how I look at myself.
I was created as a perfect woman, no judgments or expectations placed on me when I came out of the womb. I want my daughters to see that is how I see them, the perfect creations and miracles they are. It doesn't matter how they look to others, because they are beautiful to me. It's funny, I love to see the beauty in others cuz it seems to rub off on me...
Anectdote for the day: My youngest heard a commercial for BudLight and asked, "Does my butt look light?"
Soccer quote for the day: "The vision of a champion is someone who is bent over, drenched in sweat, and the point of exhaustion, when no one else is watching." Anson Dorrance
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